Tuesday, 9 January 2018

the entree to ENTREE TO LOVE

Happy New Year love bugs

Well, I am so excited to be shifting my writing focus onto something a little more lighthearted and hopefully more fun this year. 
I've actually kicked off the new year feeling really fresh and it's amazing how many people have actually said to me "jan, this is your year".  Like have literally come to me and said it. I'll high five that. Thank you very much, please have my year delivered to the door in daily fun installments.... cause it's MY FUCKING YEAR!

I've even written it on a giant post it....that's how much of a year it's going to be for me and I am adding the things that I want to achieve.
 
I was thinking about the writing project I just finished and it was amazing how as cathartic as it was, it was also something that kept my mind thinking and thinking about how I would interpret each piece of written work.  It was quite exhausting (but fun). The topics weren't heavy but the road I was taking seemed to be.  In fact it was bloody heavy at times, but that was then and this is now and it feels like I have lifted this massive weight off my shoulders. Don't get me wrong, I loved it, I thought about quitting numerous times, but I am so glad I didn't.  It was a journey that gave me more than I ever expected on a level of personal growth and freedom.

So what now?  What on earth would a spunky, funny, sassy, single in the city kinda girl want to turn her attention to? What could it possibly be? Have a guess? That's right, it's love.  LOVE
elle
ohhh
veee
eeeeeeekkkk
spells LOVE.

As I have navigated single life the past couple of years, the thing I was hoping for was to meet a nice fella and go on a journey.  What happened though, is that I met a few fellas, some good, some bad, some good/bad and some downright ugly and the journey's reflected said good, bad and ugly. And when I say ugly, I mean who the fuck are you, kind of ugly. Trust me, the screen shot folder in my phone is full of candid camera moments, from dick pics, to messages, to screen shots of people's profiles that have just left me laughing and horrified and wondering 'who the fuck are you people"?  I know who you people are......you are NOT my people! Bet you are all dying to see some of those. Anyway, don't sweat the small stuff right, I am an expert with the block button and this time has given me the strength, reflection, patience and desire to consider what it is I want and the type of person who I want in my life. And I am 100% sure of what I don't want and 100% sure of what I do want.
 
In defense of the highlighter guy, he was asking what my shoe size was......but why the fuck would he want to know that? Hello freaky mcshoefetish face.

What's been interesting though is that I have not met one man in the offline environment. That has been the case always with me. They just don't gravitate towards me and when I do meet men from online, they can't believe that I and single and don't have guys swarming around me like I'm the queen bee luring them to the honey pot. There's been no response to my upturned bananas in the shopping trolley, or feeling the ripeness of my melons in the fruit shop.....nada, zilch. zero.

Even though my online conversion rate hasn't been fantastic - the ghosts, the breadcrumbers, the stinky catfishers, the married, the flakes, the can't be arsed and as sad as that is, the face to face conversion has been nada...zilch....zero. I could walk through the valley of the men dolls while naked, handing out free tickets to sporting events and beers and I would wager a hundred bucks that they wouldn't even notice. Maybe that's a little far fetched, but you get the idea.  N.Z.Z. 
If it wasn't for the world of online dating, who knows how the fuck I would meet anyone and get my social needs met. How do I change that face to face interest?  That's going on my list.  I am wondering though if there are rules against joining a nunnery after your cherry has been popped?  Maybe that's a business venture to consider for women considering a career change when the cloak of invisibility has been thrown their way and their popped cherry's become something in the dried fruit aisle. Only useful to make a Christmas pudding, and shit Christmas has gone and they have to wait another 12 months for the fruit to be soaked so to speak.

So dating has been an hilarious part of my water cooler conversations at work and out of work, with belly laughs a plenty that come when we discuss said good, bad and the ugly and my newly coined N.Z.Z.

My kicker came when I was stood up by the same guy twice after he initiated contact and the catch ups he arranged.  Happy to give someone the "make a fake excuse once", but twice just doesn't cut it and with that I was kind of propelled to think about this whole dating and love bizzo and what I could possibly do different to ensure I win the prize that I have my eye on. And that prize is to be shot by cupids big fat arrow right slap bang in the middle of my heart.💘💘💘💘💘💘💘 so it sprays bursts of red heart glitter everywhere with each pounding beat.
Through my conversations with others, there is an undeniable desire for people wanting to connect with others in the flesh, before they flash the flesh and get their flesh all hot and sweaty. Think old fashioned dating.  It was a thing once and maybe everything old needs to be new again. People I know really want to find something more meaningful and to step out from behind the keyboard and interact in person. The online world has gone mad and it is bloody hard work, with not a lot of return on investment. People are fatigued by it, and what I have noticed is that it's an ego boosting tool when you match with someone and that person never initiates or returns a simple message.  "Hey, look, someone likes me" and then.....N.Z.Z

So following my kicker, I was propelled to put on my thinking cap and take matters into my own hands and come up with an idea.  I am reaching out to people I know who are single and have single friends who also have single friends and see if I can bring us all together.  Not like keys in a bowl kind of way, but in a like meets like kind of way. Think of it like the right kind of love virus to keep spreading.
When I floated my idea with my sister, she also thought it was a winner so I am sharing with you ENTREE TO LOVE, my idea to bring people together with food and genuine opportunity to meet and interact in a safe real time space. I see it suited to those who are over online dating, are wanting to meet someone special, make new friends of same and opposite sex or to take those first scary steps back into the dating world without being slapped down by the BS that comes with one of the few either expensive and nasty, cheap and nasty or free and nasty sites that are swamping the market.  I wanna keep it real people, because I am real.

When the name came up there wasn't one hashtag, the name wasn't taken, so I took it as a sign from the love gods and I am running with it.
And here's how I want to do it.  I want to combine my love of vegetarian food and cooking, communicating, creativity, warmth and happiness, passion for people and love of love to see if I can make a difference to those like me who really want to find another loving soul to be with and are open to whatever may come along.

It's not a matchmaking service (although I have a few success stories there) but it will be an even mix of men and women and I will only ask for a small cost (like 30 bucks) to cover the food that I will arrange for the gathering.  It may be dinner at my home, a picnic in the park or who the fuck knows what hair brain idea may pop into my head.  It will also be alcohol free.  I am not anti-alcohol, but think that it's a great idea to keep things clear headed when we being considerate of other people and their feelings.

And that's it.  I am holding my first one on Saturday 20th January and will schedule as interest dictates, but at least one a month.

You can follow along, or contact me for more information through

Entree to Love instagram
Facebook page
or email me  at entreetolove@hotmail.com

I look forward to sharing some some stories, and recipes and adventures and anything that will make its way to Entree to Love and I hope that you go through your friends list and friendzone list and consider whether people you know are ready for something like this, or if you would love to be a part of it.

And with that, hello 2018 and hello to love.....it's gonna be my year and hopefully yours as well, especially if you have been looking for love in all the wrong places. xxxx

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