Well this is certainly turning out to be a journey into honesty, enlightenment, self discovery and change. I have had a number of people contact me wanting to know the name of the book i am reading and here it is and my reason I am doing it is twofold. firstly, i want to cut back or stop my evening or partying drinking (guess that doesn't leave me with anywhere to go) and i am doing so many more substantial things and feeling amazing in such a short space of time, and secondly because i want to support and understand what my son is going through as he manages his addiction to codeine and i have found this book to be a game changer.
Every chapter of the book so far, has required me to be engaged, committed and open to wanting and accepting that i have chosen to change an aspect of my life that is so commonplace in society.
Alcohol is big business. It's used as gifts, to celebrate, to commiserate, to start fights, to end fights, to enjoy, to abuse, to cook with, to make sex better, to make sex worse, to reduce stress, to benefit from its health properties, to make us more likable, or less likable, to use it as an excuse, to make sure our life is full of fun, to kill aphids on my gardenia and to launch ships. So many uses.
When I look at that list that i just threw out, it seems that i'm doomed for a boring fucking life but my gardenia is going to thrive. And i remind myself, that everyday i go about my business being a great person who doesn't drink, till she gets home and has a few vino's or is on a social outing. People seem to like me and i don't need alcohol to make this happen for the majority of the day - it's may natural real state of awesomeness. However, i have a limiting belief that people won't like me. But i go about just being me the only way i know how and don't let those feeling take over.
So as i continue to make my determination as to what role if any alcohol will have in my life post this solution, i have to really look at the limiting beliefs that i my have and explore and remove them. This relates to all aspects of my life, not just the boozy woozy. I owe it to myself to at least consider this, because i don't want to be held back in any way.
Limiting beliefs seem to come from emotionally powerful events and often from our childhood. The event has passed and yet we give it so much meaning - both positive or negative and the negative component seems to have all the power that drives us to possible failure
Today we look at our theme - belief truths and lies, we will recognise and change them at a subconsious level, we learn about the power of belief and how our brain filters information if it doesn't match our dominant beliefs, the lies we live by which are limiting us, and the source of our beliefs, where we have to change our interpretation and meaning of some events in our life.
Change the meaning, change the belief, change your life.
Well I'm about to have my beliefs challenged and cross-examined in the courtroom of my mind. And right on que, here's my lawyer. She'll sort me the fuck out, and not just in the fashion stakes.
Fuck i hope Judge Judy makes another appearance cause she's a tough MOFO and won't let me try and pull the wool over her eyes. Please all stand while the queen of daytime tv enters the room.
There was a lot of action items today and ones that required me to really challenge my thinking and my beliefs. Go figure, so I am not going to document from my journal or this read would be a bigger than Shapelle's boogie board. So i shall summise.
Action 1. Capture your limiting beliefs
There was a list of popular limiting beliefs that were keeping us from being alcohol free and we had to choose which were applicable. Some of them were on my list above - except for the gardenia health and the ship launching.
Action 2. Write the traits of a sober person.
i think they achieve, they may be people of action, they may use their time differently, aren't boring and they live without the need for alcohol. My nana was one of those people. She didn't need alcohol to enhance her life. She was fundamentally happy.
We had to revisit where we saw ourself in 5 years if we keep on the same path. And we had to ask "what do i want" and "who do i want to be" both really good questions.
Action 3. Cross examine our limiting beliefs.
we had to look at our limiting beliefs and write down what our life would look like if we hold onto them. we then had to make a strong case as to why those beliefs aren't actually true.
Action 4. Write new beliefs to replace the old one.
we had to create new beliefs that aligned with who we want to be and we have to keep identifying and cross-examining them in the future when we are faced with challenges. the new beliefs have to go somewhere visible so they soak into our psyche.
well today was supposed to be a fun day, but it was actually really hard and i am no longer in the witness box. I was found guilty of using my limiting beliefs, but I am free to go and keep moving forward. I haven't been given a life sentence, but i am not off scott free. I still have to serve out the remainder of the 30 day sobriety solution.
Feeling share 💗
Still not sleeping well. Have a lot on my mind with my son and am also still coughing.
I feel tired, but not sluggish or fuzzy
2.30pm. feeling good, inspired and relaxed
9pm about to have dinner and would like a wine (habit) but am having soda water and reading my vision.
this was a big piece of change, but i got there.
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