Thursday 15 October 2015

dstss - it's a category 5.

64. Practice being in the eye of the storm

i love this book don't sweat the small stuff - i love its simplicity and its practical ways of looking at life and the perspective that can be gained in order to live a more peaceful and possibly more purposeful life for yourself and those around you.

its really hard not to react when you are in a conversation turned confrontation, when you and others want to get a point across and everyone believes they are right. often due to the emotion and ego involved it can so easily becomes a whirlwind that spins out of control and it doesn't matter what the end result is as long as someone has the last and often nasty word.

i had this exact thing happen last year at home with the ongoing disagreement that was going on and i witnessed three members of my family get angrier, louder, more frustrated and lose the ability to keep focussed on the issue and remain calm to find a resolution. it was terrible.  it resulted in a lot of screaming and i just stood there and watched in horror at what was unfolding, knowing full well that if i were to dive in, the outcome would probably have been worse. i had an opinion, but it wasn't the time to express it.

so instead of buying into this, i kept my cool and became the eye of the storm and like any storm, it passes, but usually not without causing damage - either long term, or short term or in this case, both.

it's really hard to be a passenger sometimes, but i guess when you pick your battles and have the foresight to see what the potential horrible outcome could be, then it makes it that much easier to just be the eye of the storm.  on this occasion, i could have probably just disappeared unnoticed, cause the shit fight was in full effect and it only ended once it got so ugly that there was nothing left to make it sad is that, to think that people have to go to this level to get their point across!
i am by no means a perfect human being, but i am smart enough to decide that remaining calm at the time when it's probably the hardest, is really smart.

note to self: there is no magic wand to enable you to start making the choices on how to react in certain situations, but if you are finding yourself in the same situation over and over again, then maybe you are being the storm, and not the eye, where it is calm and gives you time to make a plan b. when storm season arrives, we think about how we can prepare for possible ways to minimise the damage to our valuables and yet, our family and friends are the most valuable, and they are often the ones who have to weather the emotional storm.

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