Wednesday 11 October 2017

DSTSS -- here, catch!

89. If someone throws you a ball, you don't have to catch it

All the way through this book, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, the learnings have been about living a life that is peaceful, calm, compassionate, living with kindness, patience and self awareness, listening, giving and supporting others and then today, it all gets chucked on its head when it tells me that I don't have to catch a ball when someone throws it.  Seriously, this should have been chapter 69.
Hang on, aren't I supposed to be everything for everyone, including myself?  Well, apparently not! I am allowed to decide if I want to catch other people's problems or even worse, their negative vibes if they are thrown at me. Sometimes you don't have capacity, you don't have the answers, you don't want to partake, or you just aren't prepared to own someone else's shit if they are going to throw it your way served up on a bed of chocolate pudding with whipped cream and a cherry on top.

We have the choice to take as little or as much on and deal with the fallout - our time, our emotions - or politely refuse without feeling guilt for putting your own needs first. End of Story.

Okay, well maybe it's not the end of the story. Of course there are situations where you will always catch the ball, cause it's the right thing to do and for me, I have been so grateful that people have been there to catch the balls that I've thrown and in return, my catcher's mitt has been close by. You decide what part of the story you want to own and how many balls you want to juggle. It can be all, or it can be nothing.  
Note to self:  Saying NO can sometimes be hard, especially when it's to people you love and care about or when it relates to stuff that is happening at work. Just remember that sometimes it's not my pig, not my farm and other times, it's not my circus and they aren't my fucking monkeys! There will be people and situations that you will never be able to provide the right solution to.  So relax, and let the balls drop. End of story!

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